Are we doing that this year?

Ho Ho Ho. Merry Christmas.

I'm pretty pleased with the holiday season so far. That's not 100 percent true but it's true enough. Some people have this unique gift of ruining the whole spirit of Christmas in just a few short words.

Others have a way of making me as pleased as punch, which usually involves giving me a candy cane, a hug, a cup of tea or a combination of all three (write this down if you have a poor memory).

This week has been pretty busy...a lot of eating. KFC night, Chicken bowl night, Peter's Drive In night. Starting on the 21st I'm turning into MeghanTheFit....I may even change my blog name.

Well. I think that's all for now. Have a lovely December.

A stand of some sort

Early night Because of yesterday's late night.
10:30 and sleep sleep sleep sleep
2:45 awake? No, sleep sleep No awake.
Boy's voice and talking and conversation and Lenord Cohen?
Yes, Lenord Cohen. Playing the song my middle name is named after
over and over and over and over and Bang. Sounds - just don't think about it.
4:30 and sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep
10 Awake! New day! Brush teething, boy walks by and Scream
apologize, just startled no problem.
They leave. Left with two big glass bottles to hold water instead of three
Missing third bottle and the second's lid? Weird
Ahha! The Lid. Weird.
Glass bottle full of new water back in fridge.
Happily ever after...

think

Damn it. I'm sad again.

I think I will quite my job and hide under my bed for 14 months. Then I will come out from under my little hideaway and shuffle with my head hung low into an almost deserted unkempt ice cream shop where I will order a bowl of vanilla ice cream every day and eat it very slowly with a small plastic spoon. When another 14 months pass I will order something plain with nuts but, if I'm feeling really daring I'll order tiger.
I'll be numb. All my inside parts will have lost their feeling because of the cold ice cream constantly circulating through my system but, I wont mind. After I've eaten through three more flavours I'll leave the ice cream shop and people watch. No cameras aloud and I wont look at them for too long. No trying to memorize their faces or their words or their hand gestures or the way their lips smile.
I'll start buying plants again and talk to them for as long as I can - I'll compliment them on their newest leaf formation or their particularly stunning shad of green - and I'll water them a very respectable amount. I'll eventually give them up for adoption. I'll make sure to interview the new parents and make them sign promises. Then maybe I'll go for a swim.

POP QUIZ

Can someone tell me what this says/means:

01000001
01000011
01000001
01000100
01001001
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


Thank you! Isn't this fun!? Also, if you figure out what numbers should go next (fill in those blank spaces) you win a prize...

Look over there

I don't want pasta.
My stomach feels bloated and overstuffed.
But the pot keeps boiling, I keep stirring and then I sit back down.

A desperate attempt to feel loved may have been a poor move.
Not a bad move but, it doesn't seem like it will produce good lasting results.
A quick fix...and then what? Go back to feeling sad that he isn't here anymore.

Fuck you if you think I'm too sad. These words are just for me.
Hit the X and don't come back. Forget.
Forget.

A note for cool drunks:

Because every non/functioning alcoholic needs a little hipness in his/her life.

Also, I haven't watched TV all weekend (including Friday). Go me. What else to report...umm...this weekend has been really good. It's all about keeping busy. Although I have run out of things to do now...I could join the party that's going on nearby. The music is loud but really nice. I'm almost done reading my book called The Wrong Madonna - it's really good, a little slow but it's getting me to contemplate bits of my life and all that.

Alrighty, Meghan out.

Giving in.

OK so make a plan. Phone someone. Stop sitting there and while you’re at it put on some clothes. Wipe that tear from your cheek. And smile - a really big one. Show teeth and everything.

At least stop playing sad music. Open the window or maybe just the blinds. All right you can go back to the TV but this time put on an uplifting movie - that one that always makes you laugh.

Yeah I guess it is getting kind of late. Actually most people haven't even started dinner yet. Yeah I guess getting some extra hours of sleep would do you good. Goodnight.

It's broken

I changed my blog template and was all proud of it and then I clued in that it's Joe's already! A person tries to be unique in this small world but it just doesn't work...I'm sure he doesn't mind...

Anywho, it's hot and I live in an apartment building and it's hot. I cooked a spaghetti squash tonight. That's right. I turned the oven up to 350 because I thought the apartment needed to be just a tad hotter. I haven't eaten it or anything it's just sitting on top of the stove now. I thought about eating it but instead I had two plums, two peaches and a few cheese flavoured popcorn bits...

Ummm what else. I moved my room around on Saturday or Sunday...I can't remember. That was hard work...but I haven't actually put all the stuff back on my bookshelf...so I can't reach my closet...or my mirror or my bookshelf...and there are books in the hallway.

Wow, so I'm one of those girls who talks about their day on their blog and they think they sound really cool but they're actually being boring and pathetic. See that's why I used to write random, cryptic stuff on my blog. But, really, how many people read my blog? I'm going to say...5...at the most...I guess I don't mind sounding boring to 5 people. If I start dating Prince William and suddenly people care about who I am I'll go back to being cryptic.

Well I'm glad we've figured that all out.

When will I be cured?

I keep dreaming about you...

Anyway.


Lying in the only hotel bed left in Lethbridge with eyes wide open. Hotrods are drag racing in the nearby streets and it's passed my bed time. As I cling to the left side of the king sized bed I put my headphones on and listen to music on shuffle but it doesn't drown out the engines or my dad snoring - he happens to be clinging to the right side of the same bed. As I grab hold of an extra pillow and try to magically morph it into my teddy and you, I guess I eventually fall asleep.

Don't make excuses

I'm not upset about not knowing your friends. I just want you to want me to have fun with them. I just want you to want me to know them.

Shhhhhh don't say anything. I don't need drama.

Actions are...

Hey, I'm having a super time, come join us.



RAWR. You just don't get it.

POP goes my heart

So bored.

I'm not usually bored these days. bla. But here I sit listening to some god awful music off the Moulin Rouge soundtrack. But I will love you until the end of time.

La de dum.

Speaking of Rufus. I would like all of his CDs. Please email me to obtain my mailing address. Thank you.

Also, it's been at least one week and no birds have discovered my bird feeder. I saw a sparrow on the railing of my balcony tonight and I got all excited but really he was just there to get a better look at the tasty food bits in the dumpster below. All he needed to do was look up and he would have found an assortment of tasty seeds - and he wouldn't even have had to dumpster dive *pout*.

Would you like to see some photos?
I'm going to take that as a yes.

This is the dumpster I was telling you about.


This is where the birds should be getting their food from!! (Well...after they get tired of eating bugs, leaves, worms and whatever else they would eat naturally). I bought the hook from Home Depot and the hole in the wood was already there!


Here's the bird feeder's location in relation to the dumpster.


Well maybe I'll just show you a few more...

This is our patio. My roomie hasn't seen it yet - with all the flowers...I hope she likes it. I am in charge of gardening and she was in charge of buying a table and chairs for the balcony. I'm pretty excited about being the gardener.




These are my radishes! The thinner looking green bits are carrots! I'll keep you posted on their growth, if you'd like.

There you have it.

Hi. It's been a while. How have you been? It's hot tonight and my laptop, sitting on my bare skin, is heating me up even more but, I'm not sure where else to put it.

Today I: put my feet in the cold bow river, ate Jelly Belly's and four hot dogs, put spf 60 sunscreen on my face and watched an old black and white movie called Hitchhiker.

June is the first month of my budget. So far so good...although I am only two days in.

My eyes keep closing without my permission... I think I need to go to bed.

I hope you are all doing well. Any gossip to share? Good news to deliver?

So, I uploaded a lot of pictures from my trip to L.A. on my Flickr page the other day and the most popular ones were ones with my feet in them. So I've included a foot picture in this post. I'll be famous in no time! Everyone will come to my blog to look at my feet. Or maybe there's just one person who keeps looking at my feet pictures because they love my feet...

I still have the flu. I'm taking drugs but I continue to feel like someone kicked me...a lot. What kind of symptoms do people with the Bird Flu get?

Me Flu

I'm sick. I may have a fever and I definitely have a runny nose. My head hurts me and my toes are cold...but my toes are always cold.
Save me?

So I'm going to L.A. on Saturday - and I don't mean Lethbridge, Alberta!
I hear L.A. is full of bad drugs and creeps. I hope I don't get mugged. I'm going there for a conference that work is paying for but I will have a little bit of time to look around - but I honestly have no idea what is in L.A. well...except for the hill with "HOLLYWOOD" on it. But, I hear that's in the boonies anyway.
Do you have any suggestions of where to go? Because I would like some, thanks.
I'm almost sort of not really at all packed to move to my new place. I wish the weekend to move would just come already! It feels like it's been such a long wait. Soon enough! That's next weekend. March is being soo busy. arg.
Umm what else to report. My headaches are still here and I feel dizzy all the time. And I still get hot flashes. I'm either dying or hitting menopause crazy early. I'll keep you posted.

Awkward

A zip-lock bag full of extra strength Tylenol is my new best friend. One word answers and blank looks are my new worst enemy. It seems there is always awkward balance in the world, right?

A few options

The sky is grey the grass is brown and you are a yellow-green.

1. Trendy overpriced condo. Fuel efficient car. 8-6 job. Stress. Theatre. Lobster. Lover with same.

2. Hot country. Beach. Bike. Sea shell collection. Garden. Chickens. Freedom

3. '70s apartment. Feet. 9-5 job. Stress. Blockbuster. TV. Occasional calamari. Lover with own set of dreams.

I wanna go home

So, I just saw a movie that really gave me the creeps.

Did you know this world is going to hell? I may try to ignore it and live my simple repetitive relatively calm life but the world is still going to hell all around me - and there's nothing I can do about it and no where I can hide from it.

I just really want to leave all this mess.

I've been waiting for this moment my entire life but it's not quite right.

Ok I'll admit it. I'm bored. And I really hurt. My entire body is aching. Is the weather changing? If I were you, just in case my body is trying to send us all a message, I'd prepare for some big ass snow storm tomorrow...or for a Chinook.

Umm. OK. I'm bored because I'm boring. Well...umm...I was reading some random girl's blog and she has a poll up asking women what their favorite orgasm technique is and the first place winner was oral, then intercourse and then um I think it was anal...then hand, and in last place were gadgets. There you have it! First ever bit of news on Meghanthebrave. Take note! Any girls out there who would rank them a bit differently!? Should we get a bit of a debate going on! Oh calm down I don't have a big enough "fan" base to actually start a debate.

Um, what else. Heather just came home and she is cooking something that smells very good. My guess, although probably wrong, is that it's some sort of meat sauce and pasta! Mmmm. Meat sauce.

Alright this post should have ended right after the title. But, instead, I'll end it here.

Goodnight.

If you're fond of sand dunes and salty air...

"I'm not crazy because I take the right pills."

I feel a bit empty. I'm not sure what it is but I feel like my life isn't complete. Maybe my life isn't supposed to be complete yet...of maybe I need to learn the ways of the buddhist or discover my natural ability to crochet or...I'm not sure.

I just had a flash back. Joe, doing yoga along the side of the outdoor pool near QE. I had no idea what the hell he was doing and I think other people at the pool were a bit concerned themselves but now everyone and their snobby dog does yoga. That memory has a moral to it but I'm not too sure what it is yet.

I baked banana bread/muffins tonight. Maybe I'll just live my life constantly wanting something more and something better and never being all the way content.

Or maybe I'll laugh always and smile throughout the day and sing my favorite songs out loud and dance and live.

Title

She waits patiently for something amazing to happen. Something really great. It will be like an unveiling - the fake skin draped over her muscles and bone and cartilage will be whipped away to uncover something fantastic - a transformed perfect being. She knows it will come. One day the real her will appear and she will say "Ahh yes. This feels much better. I knew I was actually an extraverted babe."

You know what?!

Words are simple, easy and safe.
Words wont mend a sad head and can be easily rehearsed.
Show me action.
Touch, feel, smile, laugh, move, reshape, devote - that's true love.