And this little piggy went...

I want an uncluttered life full of only ‘yes’ and ‘no’ answers. I should have no possessions or life choices. I want to lay in a pollution-free field and only have to respond to my surroundings by quietly breathing in and out. Let the rest of the world exchange pleasantries – I just want to breathe. I crave more and more tools but am depressed by what they demand. SCREAM until I am freed from the web of lies and sticky games or Comatose onward, like always, and wait for that something to begin and end it all.

I wish time would stop then I could redecorate where I used to work and I’d brush her hair because she forgot and I’d put an apple in some kids pocket and a thank you card in the hand of that guy over there. If the world just stopped and I kept moving – everything would be ok. Think of all the time I would have and then when time started up again – only after I had a chance to raid Safeway’s deli department and draw moustaches bellow the noses of one or two beauties think how better things would be.

just a little

I just want to say I’m in love with your hand writing. I want to keep everything you’ve written on not because of what love you’ve written about but because of the way you’ve written the letters L, S and Y.

kiss me right here

The highlight of my day was when I discovered there were actually two pickles left in the jar not just one like I had thought.

Oh I know a Miller and she's loud

"And curly hair..."

"What? Oh I thought you said 'a wooden hip'"

"What?!"


I can hear people peeing in the apartments above me.


turtle frog
left right
escalator elevator
strawberry raspberry
and then today, while walking to the c-train from work, I thought of two words that I've never mixed up before but I thought it was weird that I hadn't - knowing my history of mixing up words. But I can't remember what they were.

go away

I banged my knee hard and now there are white spots in my monitor screen.
He said *I* could have come down and now my head hurts.
Those two aren't around to hear me and now I'm writing to you, biting my lip.

fuck you.
you stubborn
hurtful
pouting fool.
You've mistaken me
for someone who will babysit
your old crying eyes.
It just so happens
I guilt easily
and harp.
Thanks for not realizing that.
And instead dumping your
sins on my lap
- wishing me to
mend them.

the secret garden

No secret is safe with me. I will open the doors and shout out to break the spell you have begged me to enforce. I fantasise of exposing every organ in your body. After I take your lungs and your spleen I will examine your heart. Then, I will whisper, very loudly, across many continents, about the secrets I recover – vital but well hidden. I want them to know the size of your heart. Every secret deserves a second chance and every chance will be well received.

Cold sparkling streams and green spongy moss

Left over mascara, sunk under my eyeballs, clings to the insides of my lids. I pull the long slimy spider legs off the conjunctiva and onto my cheeks. One poisoned blood shot eye looks back at me and somehow joins forces with my father from the past and tries to guilt me into understanding makeup’s stupidity. The graphic visual and the added bonus of an almost forgotten memory does nothing to sway my devotion to the product. Instead, I wonder if perhaps I should have bought the one with less doubling power and in the brown tint.

Senses are forgotten and Nothing consumes.

I wouldn't know how to be this way now

Turns out sipping on warm alphagetti while watching soft-core porn on a Tuesday afternoon isn’t as fun as one would think it should be.