Create meaning

Thank you to my lovely roommate/tenant for passing on some simple, but wise life advice:

If you search for the meaning of life, you'll never find it. Instead, create your meaning.

Always have a passion. Or at least always be looking for your next passion.

Thank you roomie :)

Blogs are for sad people

I've been single for a month and was doing ok until last Sunday. Now I'm so sad. I almost forgot what it feels like to be sad and alone. Not having any plans. Not having anything to live for.

It's been more than a year, but I remember these feelings very clearly now. Almost like I never had that year off. I remember how it will consume me. How it might be calm for a moment, but the waves keep coming. They will keep crashing down.

Four years older

I was thinking today that maybe I should start a blog. So, I Googled "Blogger" and it automatically signed me into this blog! I completely forgot about it. I read a few of the last posts I wrote...So dramatic. Jeez.

Anyway, I thought of a little poem on my dog walk today. It was longer, but this is all I can remember:

My back aches to fall back onto marshmallow snow
Firm soft flat snow that will hold my shape and reflect an angel
When i finally get up

Then there was some part about a perfect canvas for my back or something...but I can't quite remember that part.

It's snowing, I'm glum and the anti-abortion group is on campus.

I've decided to blog again---instead of opening up to random men. I need to stop reeling people in by opening myself up to them.

Just listen. Don't dump, judge, leave, fade, laugh, worry or wonder.